Mother’s Day Homily
Allison & Erin Dunne
When Father John asked me to speak at Mass, I told him ever since I was a young
girl (probably around 10 years old or so) the Mother's Day mass was one that I
really looked forward to. I was truly inspired by listening to those women
speaking about the joys and rewards of motherhood. Then I left his office, got
in my car and put my head on the steering wheel and thought "What am I in
for? How do I express all my thoughts, all my emotions, all my joys, and all my
fears in a way that truly represents what it means to be a mother?" Those
of you who are moms already know just what I'm trying to put into words. I
don't know if words can truly describe all of what I feel, but here I go!
Ever since I could remember I have always wanted to be a mother. I couldn't
have thought of a better job even though it would be challenging with an often
chaotic environment, long hours, no pay, no health benefits, virtually no
promotions nor advancements, 24/7. It was a job that would last a life time. My
mother set the example of motherhood. When my 3 brothers and I would come home
from school she was always there, with homemade cookies, dinner set on the
table, breakfast was always served with a smile, she was always there at ball
games and life seemed so in tact and in order. It was easy for me to think this
was the dream job. But, as I have learned from being a mom myself, it's not
always that dreamy.
I was also blessed to have my grandmother in my life on a daily basis while I
was growing up. My nanny and I would play cards, bake, watch T.V., play the
piano and discuss what was happening in the world. Her gently loving
perspective always sought the silver lining in every dark cloud. I try to think
of how nanny would handle those situations with my own children when I'm at my
wits end and I feel like I could just scream. She was, and still is, my
guardian angel.
Today's gospel is about Jesus as the good Shepherd. He says that a good
Shepherd is not a person that can be hired; no amount of pay can begin to
define the value of a mother. The selfless sacrifices that being a mother
requires reflect Jesus' message. Mothers devote their lives to others'
well-being, as Jesus did for all of us. And we all know that life is not
perfect all the time, but if we let go and let God, everything will turn out
alright.
As I read the gospel and searched my soul as to how to express my feelings about being a mom "wow!" my
"mother's world" would erupt around me. First, there would be the
girls fighting; then spilled soda on the white
carpet; then the phone would ring; was dinner ready? what
was for dinner? Clothes had to be ironed, and the list goes on and on. One
night I asked my eldest daughter,
5 years ago I went through some pretty confusing times. I was second guessing
myself as a woman, wondering if staying home with the children was the right
thing for me. In my discussions with other moms, it was a common concern. I
asked my husband Kevin what I should do. With his smile and support he told me
to do what I felt I needed to do. He has always supported me. So I went back to
work in sales. The type of sales that I was in required a lot of nights and
weekends. As a result I was missing out on a number of school
and evening activities. For 2 years I lived with a beeper and cell phone, and
practically out of my car. I was making good
money and moving up in the company quickly, but something was missing. It has
been my experience that when you feel that you really need something, God has a
way of guiding us in the right direction (and often we don't even know it!)
That's when Father John invited me to participate in the MOMS program, and
slowly, I began to understand what was right for me. MOMS is
a faith-based journey of self-acceptance and affirmation in our roles as
mothers. It was reassuring to know that other moms were having the same
feelings and insecurities as I was. But we all had the same goal in wishing to
bring our children up in a Christian household, and being a family unit. I have
always believed in family and that family comes first; so what was I gaining
from working and being away from my family and for what? My 3 daughters were
growing up so quickly and I was missing out on that. Dinner time is such an
important time for the family and I wasn't there. So I decided to reconnect
with my family and focus on being the best mother I could be. I feel blessed I
had the opportunity to make that change and that our family was in a position
that I could do so.
Earlier I mentioned that my mother was my first inspiration and role model.
Today's world is far different than the world I knew as a child. The demands on
a mother are complex and challenging, not that they weren't back then. The
family is still the central focus but the shape of the family is as diverse as
ever. The role of the mother as caregiver and comforter remains crucial, and
for many families mom must also be a significant wage earner. The position of
mom is also filled by a step mother, grandmother, or foster mother in many of
today's families. Balancing the demands of career and children take
multi-tasking to the limit, and I know that God has a special place in heaven
reserved for "Moms only". I know that our prayers do not go
unheard. This must be what helps us to hold it all together when it seems that
the job is never-ending.
We have a busy, active family life. But we work together! The kid's
schedules are full with school and sport activities, my husbands work
responsibilities require a lot of flexibility and there are always all those
other things that come along that really keeps us juggling our schedule. But we
make sure that God and the family remains the center of our lives. We just need
to step back, and take a deep breath sometimes and tell God "thanks"
for the energy to keep up, even when we think that we can't. Because if
we moms can't do it, who will?
I want to thank